Date night last night was Day 252 since our first date :-) We had an excellent date night after a wonderfully lazy day. I spent the morning sewing a birthday gift for Miss Mary Claire while Paul was contentedly playing games on his iPhone (all the while wishing it was the iPhone 4 rather than the inferior 3GS). Then we went to The Body exhibit at the Start Museum at UT and "ooed" and "awed" at how amazing our mere existence and creation really is. Against the advice of some dear friends, I braved the prenatal room wondering if I was "ready" to see it. I was overwhelmed with how encouraging and exciting that section was; not disturbing as many friends and myself anticipated it being...it pointed both of us back to the Lord!! As we read what happens in each week of pregnancy and saw the fetal development we stared at one another in AWE that we have the privilege of serving a God who not only set this in motion but is in charge of each little bone in our bodies. As we continued through the entire exhibit, we both marvelled at how miraculous our creation really is.
Then off to Kerby Lane where I shared an awesome dinner and conversation full of laughs with my best friend and husband. We sat across the table talking about the respective books we were reading and what we were gaining from them, enjoyed sharing a plate of enchiladas (sans the evil herb cilantro) and joyfully had an excellent Diet Coke-filled dinner together.
Then home where we took some time to check email and chat some more. As we crawled into bed, Paul was kicking some Zombie butt on a game I can't even begin to understand on his phone (something about planting different plants that then become your defense against the Zombies who are trying to eat your brain....i.e. a reality-based game) so I picked up "Love and War" (Eldredge). We have both been wanting to read it but other books in our quickly-growing library have taken precedence. The first chapter examines vows at a wedding ceremony. "Why in heaven's name would you come to church to publicly dedicate yourselves to something so risky, so fraught with danger, so scandalous?" It basically asserts that "in choosing marriage you have chosen an assignment at the front lines in this epic battle for the human heart." The chapter ends with 2 simple sentences: "It can be done. And it is worth it." The truth here is undeniable--Satan hates to admit that he is losing the battle and when 2 people enter into marriage focused on HIM, Satan gets mad. So the path is not always easy but it is worth it.
Thank you Lord...this was the perfect encouragement to a wonderful day....and then I went to brush my teeth. I stopped at the computer and saw a girl I went to college with who just had a baby. This is exciting but I am tired and don't want to get sucked into the computer....focus...go brush your teeth, Rach. In the bathroom I notice the scale, critique the reflection in the mirror, start to lament over a few extra pounds and then go into the bedroom and ask my husband "do you still like the way I look?!?" Poor man just spent a great day with a sane wife only to be crawling into bed with Miss Insecurity. He very sweetly encouraged me the way he has so many times before we go to sleep and then we go to sleep...in theory!
I toss and turn feeling the Lord impress upon me to email a friend some encouragement....I do. And then hope that my obedience will equal sleep. Nope. More tossing. More turning. More obsessing over being "behind" because someone younger than me has a baby now (hello--married 5 months here--take a breath, Rach), obsessing over body image, obsessing over being overly critical. Restful sleep was simply not on the agenda.
When Paul attempted to wake me up this morning, I greeted him with a whiny need for a kiss (ok, this is relatively normal) and then said "I did not sleep at all...I'm not in a good mood." Somewhere in there I asked him to pray because I did not want to be mean all day. But I felt much more like Oscar the Grouch than Polly Anna....
As we pull up to church, we are early so Paul can practice for the ensemble. I then beat myself up for not bringing the paper with me to clip coupons with me extra time this morning. I "settle" for walking into church and reading scripture. I decide to read Philippians 4 because the verse about not worrying, resting in the Lord is suddenly weighing on me. So I read and start taking notes. In my 20 minutes of reading and listening and taking notes it became overwhelmingly clear what happened last night...the Lord whispered to me: after a fantastic day of just being together we spent the evening being encouraged by our creation, having a blast on a date as husband and wife and the day was simply GOOD. No wonder Satan took the initiative to divide my brain obsessing over body image, envying what others have and being self-critical. He took away sleep and set up everything for me to wake up, be in a bad mood, be snippy with Paul and ruin the rest of what started to be a great weekend.
I count this as my take-home message and notice it is time for the service to begin. Kie steps up, welcomes the congregation and starts his sermon from...Philippians 4?!?! Ok Lord, clearly you are not done. The sermon spoke directly to my heart echoing what had just been whispered. Like dropping a stone in a still pond, the ripples continued in Sunday school. Everything was tailor-made for where I was, Satan was silenced and my heart was encouraged. It was great, phenomenal, indescribable....it was GOD. What we know: Satan will act, he will attempt to sabotage and he will work the hardest when things are going the best. HOWEVER, we also know that when God moves, He moves BIG and FAST and He is at work no matter how things are going.
"Rejoice in the Lord always, I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:4-7
--RMN
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