Day 1375: Welcoming Sophie Marie Nixon into the world!

WOW! One thousand, three hundred and seventy-five days after our first date, we welcomed baby girl #2 into the world?! Anyone who says a day doesn't make a difference is wrong. Each day leading up to her birth was perfectly orchestrated by the author and perfecter of this life. Some of those days felt monotonous and others felt monumental but each was the result of trusting the Lord on Day 1 by accepting an invitation to lunch! It's a joy to tell you the story of how God planned the marvelous 1,375th day...

I woke up at 12:30am to go to the bathroom. I was up again at 1:40am for the same reason. This time I was starving and realized I was also having contractions. I laid in bed for almost an hour playing solitaire on my phone before getting up for some food. Standing in the kitchen, it occurred to me that I should time my contractions and see if they were consistent. With Lucy, my water broke, so this whole experience was very different. After an hour of having contractions every 6-7 minutes, I called the OB. The on-call midwife called back and advised me to wait until they were 3-5 minutes apart before going to the hospital. She kindly suggested that I take a bath and relax or maybe go back to bed so as to not speed things along since it was the middle of the night. She was very sweet and didn't want me to be exhausted for labor. But I was convinced this baby was coming last Wednesday, remember?! So the idea of slowing labor down seemed crazy! Despite that, I followed directions and laid down, waking Paul to tell him this was the beginning!! As I laid my head down I said, "Oh! And Happy Birthday baby!" Laying down did not achieve what the midwife had hoped because my contractions were now about every 4 minutes.

I decided to get up and shower. Yes, vanity took over and knowing we'd be heading to the hospital soon, I wanted to be clean! Contractions still every 4 minutes...yippee!! They weren't very painful yet but they were long and consistent. Shelly came over at 5am to stay with Lucy and we left shortly after for the hospital. At 6:02am I cheerily told the nurses that we were in labor. Unfortunately, when they checked my progress in Triage at 6:30am I was only dilated to 3.5cm and being in the hospital slowed my contractions to every 5-7 minutes. I was so very ready to deliver that I felt a little deflated. The midwife I'd spoken to earlier suggested that I walk and see if we progress any. So Paul and I walked....and walked...and walked.....until about 8am. At some point one of the staff members told us that x number of laps around the delivery floor was a mile. Based on that (a number I can't recall right now), we walked at least 3-4 miles total that day!

The midwife checked on me at 8am and I was at 4cm and 90%!! Yeah for being admitted...and more walking! Again my contractions slowed to every 5-7 minutes apart. It was in this moment that I realized I'd probably rushed our arrival at the hospital and could have labored longer at home. But I was also feeling some apprehension because this labor was already so different from Lucy's. When my water broke with her, it was a very clear sign a baby was coming in the near future. Timing contractions wasn't hard but knowing when they became noteworthy was a bit more difficult.

Dr. Miller arrived about noon and offered to break my water since I was still having consistent contractions but was still at a 4 and 90%. After she broke my water, the contractions slowly started to increase in intensity, length and frequency. By 1:15pm I was beyond ready for the epidural. (Early in the pregnancy, Paul and I had an "epidural conversation" where I mentioned that I might try to deliver with no epidural. The common opinion is that second babies come faster than the first (albeit not always) so my mantra was "if Sophie comes really quickly, an epidural might be kind of pointless"...ha!) I had been walking and standing since we'd arrived so while I had my IV line placed, I hadn't been connected to the IV fluids. In order to have the epidural administered, I needed to have an entire bag of IV fluid first. I never had any fears about labor but in the midst of some really intense contractions I was flooded with fear that Sophie was coming really quickly and there might not be time for the epidural. Suddenly I wished I'd had a different mantra the past nine months.

Despite the fear, the anesthesiologist arrived just before 2pm and at 2:01pm the epidural was doing a great job. At 2:20, Dr. Miller said I was at a 6!! Our wonderful music minister/friend came for a brief visit and to pray with us. He left about 2:40pm and within ten minutes I was feeling a marked change in pressure.

Dr. Miller checked me again at 3pm and said, "Let's have a baby!" We were at a 10 and 100%! I pushed through three contractions and at 3:18pm our Sweet Sophie Marie was born. When they placed her on my chest I noticed that she was kind of blue but all I could do was smile and say hello to my perfect daughter. Her cry was instantly her own--she sounded distinctly different from her sister. It wasn't until later when we were introducing her to our family and telling the story, that Paul and I realized how blue she really was. During delivery, the cord got wrapped around her neck and it was too tightly wrapped to be removed while she was partially delivered. When she was delivered she was wailing so we didn't really have a chance to freak out about her coloring. We were blessed to have a physician who didn't panic either.

Our family flooded the room to meet the newest member and it was such a precious moment to introduce Lucy to her baby sister!

Day 1, I accepted a lunch invitation....only the Creator of Heaven and Earth knew that on Day 1375, I'd be celebrating my husband's 40th birthday in labor with our marvelous Sophie Marie!

We were fortunate to go home the following afternoon. My mom, sister and niece were at our house with Lucy when we arrived. While Lucy was captivated by Sophie the day before, I'm not sure she fully grasped the concept that this was our baby. When we arrived at the house and she saw us holding the carseat with a baby inside, she squealed, dropped her jaw and started giggling. It was just the welcome home I needed.

We recently heard Dr. Ken Hemphill do a guest sermon at our church discussing why it is essential for Christians to attend church rather than worship from the gym, work or the bike trail. Not to undermine his work and eloquence but the basic "take-home" message was this: God's glory is like a puzzle and I am but one piece. We cannot fully see the GLORY of God without seeing how he works in the lives of others--the other pieces. I love this image! And the more exciting part is that even though I experienced all the events on Day 1375, it's only in writing it down and sharing it now that I fully see His glory in the birth of my daughter. How exciting is that!?! We get to see more of God's glory by witnessing it in others and in the telling of our own stories--there is always more!!

That my friends, just like my children, is both miraculous and marvelous!

Photo by the talented Jamie Ray

Marvel

We think of both our girls as miracles because we know that their existence defies the odds and points to God! When Lucy was born I decided that the best way to express this on her birth announcement was by simply stating the definition of "miracle" and including her name as one of the definitions....

Even though Sophie is equally as miraculous, she needed her own word! For weeks now I have been searching for an equally powerful and accurate word for our second miracle. There were a few I liked, though none really spoke to me. On the list was "marvel" but it just didn't seem to fit so I kept asking God to show me the word for Sophie.

Today is September 4th and for a multitude of reasons I am convinced Sophie is coming today. While she is still nine days from her due date and what feels like an eternity after that before I would be induced, today feels like the day. Even if I am eating my words at 12:01am tonight when it becomes September 5th, I 'm standing by my feeling. So today, September 4th, I picked up my bible study reading (we're reading an old testament and new testament passage each day to read the entire bible in a year) and started reading Exodus 34-35. Under the heading "The Covenant Renewed" I came across Exodus 34:10 (God speaking):

And he said, "Behold, I am making a covenant. 

Before all your people I will do marvels, 

such as have not been created in all the earth or in any nation. 

And all the people among whom you are shall see the work of the Lord, 

for it is an awesome thing that I will do with you.

What do you know?! In an instant "marvel" completely fit as Sophie's word! Some translations use the word "wonders" or "miracles" but regardless, each points back to the work of the Lord. Sophie is the work of the Almighty Lord!

A passage the Lord took us to early on our path of infertility was John 9:1-3:

As he passed by, he saw a man blind from birth. 

And his disciples asked him, 

"Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?" 

Jesus answered, "It was not that this man sinned, or his parent, 

but that the works of God might be displayed in him.

Doesn't that sound shockingly similar to the end of Exodus 34:10 "...And all the people among whom you are shall see the work of the Lord, for it is an awesome thing that I will do with you."

Webster defines "marvel" as:

noun:

1: one that causes wonder or astonishment

2: intense surprise or interest

intransitive verb:

:to become filled with surprise, wonder or amazed curiosity

transitive verb:

:to feel astonishment or perplexity at or about

You are indeed a marvel sweet Sophie Marie, whether you come today, September 4, 2013 or not! 

Sophie's Story

We are two and a half weeks from our due date so I figured I should document Miss Sophie's story! Since my last post, we have also moved into our first house and miraculously gotten settled in record time...and it's August in Texas so it's HOT! My second sweet baby girl is welcome to come anytime!!

Ok...on with Sophie's Story:

It was January 7, 2013 and I thought I had a kidney infection. I'd been having left-sided pain and nausea all day long. Paul had just left work for the day and I called him saying we needed to go to the urgent care when he got home. About ten minutes later, I called him back and said I couldn't wait and was going to take the baby and go now. So I went and they ran tests which showed no trace of a kidney infection or any other infection. The doctor asked if I wanted him to run a pregnancy test. I knew I was about three days late but I really didn't think that meant anything. I agreed to the test just to rule it out. Just a few minutes later the doctor came back in and I couldn't read his face but was fully prepared to hear that it was negative. After all, Lucy defied medical odds so another spontaneous pregnancy just wasn't going to happen. Plus, she was only seven months old, right?!?!

He said, "Well, congratulations--it was positive and it came back almost instantly." He examined me further and despite the pain I'd been having all day he didn't think it was ectopic. Paul knew I had been waiting on the results of the pregnancy test so I called him and said "Ummm, it was positive!" We were both shocked and excited!! The next day I had blood work done at my OB's office to make sure it was a normal pregnancy. At first, the numbers didn't seem consistent with my dates which could indicate an abnormal or non-viable pregnancy (this is exactly what happened with Lucy's pregnancy, too). We repeated the test two days later and confirmed that, in fact, it was a normal pregnancy!!

Paul was going on a camping trip Jan 18-19 and Gigi and Aunt Emmy came into town to hang out with Lucy and me. When they arrived, I had them unzip Lucy's jacket to reveal a onesie that said "Little Big Sister." Emmy said "WHAT?!" and Gigi just screamed! It was awesome! We had already planned to shop with Mimi that day so we headed to her house and did the same thing to her. She had the same shocked reaction as everyone else!! We contacted our family that weekend to let everyone know of God blowing our socks off AGAIN!! Sophie Marie, you were unexpected miracle #2 and we were THRILLED!!

Back Story to God's Awesomeness:
When I was about 33 weeks pregnant with Lucy, we decided to proceed with the recommended procedure for Paul. Outside of any fertility implications, there were health benefits for Paul by doing the procedure regarding hormone levels later in life. And doing it before the baby arrived ensured we wouldn't both be incapacitated simultaneously. Procedure done and then we had our precious Lucy just a few weeks later! Per doctors orders, Paul followed up with routine tests in August and we were hopeful that it had been successful. The results came back and NOTHING changed--nothing fertility related and nothing health related--nothing! While this was not what we wanted to hear, we were so thankful God had not told us to do this procedure to help our fertility and was gracious enough to give us Lucy before telling us to have this done. We were also disappointed that it hadn't helped anything as was indicated by the doctor. We decided that our fertility and family planning was God's now. Was it really ever ours to begin with?! God took us down a road we never expected; then he defied the odds and gave us Lucy. Then he defied the odds again by giving us Sophie. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that physicians and medicine are not fantastic resources. And I am exceedingly thankful to live in a place where I have access to far more medical interventions and treatments that a lot of places on this earth. However, I also firmly believe that God is sovereign over all things and while he led us to our fertility specialist and led us to do this procedure, I believe he allowed medicine to "fail" so His power and glory could be seen. And it is that power that he has chosen to show through our family twice now! We are honored that he chose us to show what he can do!

Sophie, we are so very excited to meet the person God has made you to be! And we can't wait to share how much you have already been a testimony to his power and grace even before your birth. You were loved and wanted even before we knew you existed and God has wonderful things planned for your life! Very much looking forward to seeing what day He has picked for your birthday!

5 months?!? It's been 5 months since my last post? WOW! My last post came just two months before we found out we were pregnant again so let's just say that I have chosen sleep over blogging a lot lately. We have just under one month until my first born turns a year old. Which also means that we have just about four months until I meet my sweet second born! That is hard to wrap my brain around!?! I'm working on another post regarding pregnancy number two--coming soon! Let me just say that it is simply another reflection of God's faithfulness and overwhelming gifts!

Anywho, I digress....as of late, I have come across many parenting blogs and/or articles that leave me screaming. Some, I am screaming out of frustration and others I am screaming in agreement. Let me preface by saying that parenting is personal. I think most parents would jump into a pool to grab a child too small to swim, or stop a child from walking out into a busy street, or want to ensure children are buckled safely into their cars. But aside from the basic safety measures, parenting is just as personal as my marriage. I can chat with friends when how it looks when Paul and I disagree or when he brings home flowers just because or about how we do our finances. But no matter what, I guarantee that their marriage will look different than mine because it is their own. Likewise, their parenting will look different than mine.

I feel the need to repeat this more for my own benefit than anyone else's. Their parenting will look different than mine (wash, rinse, repeat). I say this because it is so easy to get sucked into thoughts like "look how sweet those kids are behaving and today is just not our day", "that mom looks dressed with makeup on and is leisurely walking through HEB--I am wearing the same thing as yesterday, Lucy is screaming and if I can't find this last ingredient in ten seconds then we're ordering pizza for dinner", "Lucy will sleep through the night so I must have made a better decision than her--they are still up four times every night", "I am still ok giving Lucy a pacifier--does this really make me a bad mom"....oh how the comparison list could go on and on....

I recently read an article about a blog that left me rolling on the floor laughing! A mom simply listed out all the advice she received as a new mom. Every other sentence contradicted the previous and all the advice came from "experts". If anyone followed all of this advice they would be left walking in circles, likely with a crying baby in their arms. Here's a brief excerpt to illustrate my point:

Naps should only be taken in the bed, never in a swing, car seat, stroller, or when worn. Letting them sleep in the car seat or swing will damage their skulls. If your baby has trouble falling asleep in the bed, put them in a swing, car seat, stroller, or wear them. Use the crib only for sleep and keep it free of distractions. If the baby is having trouble adjusting to the crib, have them play in it first. If the baby wakes up at night and wants to play, put fun toys in the crib to distract them.

My most recent article was a comparison about parenting in the US vs other countries. Many of the points made were about encouraging age appropriate independence, problem solving, responsibility and life skills. In my opinion, regardless of my country of residence, these are fantastic skills for our children to learn. We would each teach them differently because we are different parents but why wouldn't we want to teach our precious babes these skills? Before my promotion to full time mom, I had the opportunity to work in an environment supervising people as well as simply being a member of a team. What I gleaned from my years working outside my home is that a lot of people in my generation were not taught these skills and as such, seemingly don't have the skills necessary to teach them to their children. Perhaps I wouldn't agree with the way parenting is viewed in Japan or Sweden or any other country but I do know that I also don't agree with the trend we have going on here in the US.

I attend a local MOPS group and there is a different speaker at each meeting. One speaker said something that has stuck with me:
"I have to remember one thing: someone else can always make cookies or serve on that committee or set up the carnival. But I am the only person that can be the mom to my kids because GOD made ME perfectly to do it."

I believe this to be a very true statement. God did make me perfectly to parent MY kids. He didn't make me perfectly to parent your kids or the kids I see at Chickfila or HEB. Likewise, he didn't make anyone else for my precious babies. Knowing what I know about God's character, I know that if he made me to do a specific job, then he holds the tools I need to complete that job. Now, more than ever before in my life, it is clear how essential it is to keep my eyes lifted to HIM for answers. Now, in my parenting, I can see a whole new side of my God--I can see him as Father and how he parents me and all my quirks differently that my neighbor. He reveals himself to each of his children in ways unique to who they are so why would he then expect us to parent his next generation of unique creations in any other way?!

Paci or no paci, co-sleep or solo-sleep, home-school, public or private....God has a plan for you, your children and your family. Surrendering to that (easier said than done) and resting in that helps me tune out the "experts" (published or otherwise) and enjoy my sweet babes! It also helps foster confidence in my parenting whether we are having a charmed day at HEB or a meltdown throughout Target.