Day 355: Thanksgiving 2010

Oh, Thanksgiving....a time to eat waaaaaay more than we should and enjoy every bite!! Everyone has their own customs, traditions, menu and image of how Thanksgiving should be....and then you get married and suddenly the image has to change! While most couples deal with at least one Thanksgiving together prior to being married, Paul and I are still a few days away from our first date anniversary. Thus, just before Halloween we started to discuss how this Thanksgiving would go and how we'd get to see everyone...

my mom, his mom, my dad and stepmom, his dad and stepmom...

...the only thing concluded from this conversation was that we would clearly have a lot of driving followed by a lot of turkey. While this did not seem overwhelmingly appealing, we resolved that it would be nice to see everyone and with everyone in the Dallas area, this would not be quite the crisis it first appeared. Then the phone rang...

My stepmom, Gerry, called with an interesting proposition. "Since everyone wants to see you guys, why don't we all do Thanksgiving together? One person can host and the rest of us can bring all the food. Do you think everyone would go for that? I just think that would save y'all some driving."

At first, I was not sure what to say because the better part of my life has been spent balancing both sides of my family; honestly only getting them together for major events (graduations and most recently, my wedding). I hung up the phone and Paul called his mom who said they would love to do this. Paul's dad would be visiting family in North Carolina but his stepmom would be happy to attend and bring food. Since this was Gerry's idea, clearly she and dad were on board so I called mom. She was also on board and wanted to host it at her house. I hung up the phone and just sort of stared at Paul for a moment because I wasn't sure this had really happened....all, ALL of our family will be having Thanksgiving together...oh, ok (let that sink in for a bit).

My hostess-mother started planning immediately (napkins, tablecloths, dishes, etc)--let's just say that the apple didn't fall at all. After an evite was sent and people decided on what to bring, our family-wide Thanksgiving was really under way....surreal, but under way. Don't get me wrong, I was excited but it was laced with trepidation about how this would all work.

Paul and I drove to Dallas late Tuesday night and mom and I continued cooking Wednesday. Thanksgiving morning arrived and the house smelled like it always had--Maw Maw Weezie's dressing, turkey, gravy--yumm!! Then the door bell rang, my little sister's boyfriend, then my older sister arrived...normal crew, not strange (and more food brought more yummy smells...mmm). Then Paul's stepmom arrived followed closely by my dad, stepmom and grandmother (dad's mom)....still not strange (I just kept waiting for the other shoe to fall, the awkward silence to ensue or something). Ding-dong! My half sister and her husband. Finally our group was complete when Paul's mom, sister, niece and nephew, and family friend arrived. Everyone unloaded their dishes, the turkey was beautifully brown and at 2pm Paul blessed this wonderful meal.

Following the prayer, Paul's mom got emotional remembering last Thanksgiving when Paul so desperately wanted to get married. I remember having the same feeling--if someone had told me last year that I would be a newlywed of 8 1/2 months this Thanksgiving I wouldn't have believed them (but a part of me would have been hoping). BUT, if someone had told me that I would not only be married but also have my ENTIRE family under one roof for Thanksgiving I would have laughed in their face. Looks like I'm the one to be laughed at...and what's more--everyone was themselves...

• Mom requested that the red plates remain on the red table and the green and brown plates remain on the green and brown table so that pictures would look better (again, this apple didn't fall from the tree).


• We all laughed when our technologically-challenged and resistant dad's cell phone rang at the table (with 17 people in one room, no one would have bet his would be the one to ring).


• The conversation derailed at least once, just like normal, to bizarre bodily functions.


• Paul squeezed my hand after his prayer like he always does and I just stared at his beautiful blue eyes.


• Jokes were told and memories shared.

Not only was this Thanksgiving just like so many I've had my whole life--it might just have been better. We like to say that our relationship is a "Jesus Whirlwind"--which it is! But, it has to do with so much more than us. The credit for our family enjoying Thanksgiving under one roof goes 100% to our gracious Lord and Savior--and it's exciting to see that He used our relationship and marriage to help execute part of His plan.

This is a very vivid picture of the redemptive power of Christ. We, as humans, are going to sin. Living a life free from sin takes work and daily connection to the Father--and even then, we are going to sin. BUT, when we seek Him out and are humble enough to admit that we can't do this alone, a wonderful thing starts to happen.....redemption of all our sinful decisions, desires and deeds. Not that there aren't consequences to our actions--both of our families have gone through intense pain, hurt feelings, hurtful words and hard times due to divorce. Anyone who says you can come out of divorce unchanged has never experienced it. BUT, when we invite Christ into the situation, He can take all the pain, hurt feelings, hurtful words and hard times and give them purpose. They are still there, the words may still hurt when we remember them, lost dreams may still break our hearts but through CHRIST all can be brought together as a testimony to His power and grace.

Thanksgiving 2010 was a testimony to His power and grace....and it gives me such indescribable hope for the future, for when I have children of my own. It was healing for me to have all my family enjoying--really enjoying--Thanksgiving together. And it will be a wonderful display to my children of the love they can experience with Jesus.

What was I thankful for this Thanksgiving? Jesus and the crazy wonderful family he gave me--be it from birth, marriage or along the way.

--RMN